To Cupid…

- Pragya Narang

I didnt go looking for love!!!
Love was the one who came

knocking at my door!!
Begging to be let in.
When I refused to open,
Love seeped into my home
From the gap under the door
And swirled around my feet.

I loved the feeling
Of the cool, healing touch of love
In the most tired part of me
So, I unlocked the door
And opened it wide to welcome love.

But oh! Just as I thought
Love would come flooding in..
The exact opposite happened.
Whatever little had seeped in
Also rushed out from under my feet
Leaving just a damp feeling

I waited; Door open..
But all I could see
Was love receeding back into the horizon.

I ran out calling behind it
Yet, it went further and further
And soon the cool feeling
Was replaced by that of hot burning sand
I felt cheated, abandoned.

Now, I can either go back home
And wait for the high tide to come in again
Or I can burn my feet on the hot sand
And jump into the whirlpool of love
Knowing well it will break me into a thousand pieces
And I will never be able to
Get out of it again!

PS: I decided to go back and this time I shall seal my door…GRRRRR….

This is all the mind has to say…

.

Someone asked for a dedication, here it goes…

Mumbai Local.. the word is enuf

1^st Encounter:  7^th july 1900 hrs (dedicated to 3 lovely ladies)

Waiting  for half n hr when I wasn’t able to get an auto for Malad after office, local (Mumbai local train) was the option which came across my mind.. I asked gentle lady standing beside me:

I: Excuse me, Where to take an auto for the station ?

Lady1: Come with us

I was happy to follow.. Soon I realized that those ladies were waiting for bus to go the station ( as they werent taking any auto).. I was befuddled…. are they waiting for one of the same buses those I see in the morning, the saame buses which I described earlier, hmm…., so an adventure trip..

I was ready, as expected when the bus came the ladies started rushing.  Although I was exactly behind them, 5 odd ppl boarded the bus in between us, I actually counted them. Neverthless, I managed to get in the bus n also got a seat which those ladies didn’t, phewww. After 5 mins I get a call n I m busy talking, suddenly I realize the ladies arent there.. jesus.. where must have they gone.. n actually everybody was getting out.. so did I. I looked around.. Lady1 has disappeared, Jesus, WHAT DO I DO!

On my left I saw a mob going in some direction; that must b the station I though, I started walking along. I felt I have entered the Delhi-6 area, saaree shops, pav walas, buk shop, toyshop etc etc. After reaching my platform I realized that one has to buy ticket to travel in a train… I asked around.. back to ground zero.. huh.. came to counter which was at the starting point, a long queue, took the ticked, back to Platform No. 4, a train was passing by. As a dear friend had told me, I looked for the place where ladies stand.. n I got that easily. There was this lady

I : Is this the platform from where Borivali train will go?

Lady2: Yes this is.

I : What time the train will come

Lady2: It jus left!

I : When will the next one come

Lady2: 15 mins, stand back otherwise you will be pushed in the train

I : Ok, thanks

The next train was  Virar fast.. 30-40 odd ladies were waiting for it. It arrived, already flooded, n 7-8 females managed to board that, one droppes her sandal, screams everywhere, train left.. In not more than 10 seconds the ladies standing there started fighting amongst themselves ‘Beech mein khada ho jaate hain’, ‘tumko nahi chadna hume chadne deta’, ‘hume ghar jaana hai’, ‘tum khadi thi sabse aage’, ‘chadne ko nahi hota hai’, ‘mera pati bolega’ etc etc

Lady2 also disappears in the meanwhile!

Next is Virar slow.. which stops at Malad, I was back on platform, slid on front position, on second thoughts I came back two steps, train arrived. Scout was ready, (holding bag from two hands, attentive to shoes that they don’t fall while getting in!), n b4 she realized the mission was over!!

Lady3: Madam aage ho jaao jagah nahi hai

I : aage bhi jagah nahi hai

Lady3: are hai na, udher mein

I wasn’t able to find a place so I just squeezed myself to window. Lady3 also adjusted. I was choked, bt sumhow it was all so amusing, I had never seen so many ladies, only ladies at one place together apart from any kirtan n all. Two stations passed

I : Next is Malad station, rite?

Lady3 : Yes, ( a pause) you have to go malad

I : Ya (smiling)

Lady3 : But you wont be able to get out

I : (a pause) why??????

Lady3: nobody will get down b4 borivali

I was speechless; .seeing my face, Lady3 pushed 3-4 other ladies shouted at one, made some space for me, n I was able to pass through, god bless her! I was at gate, lady standing at the edge asked me to go in front of her.. is she mad, she’s already at the rim I stood beside her only. Station came I had to literally push her n get down, first attempt I was pushed back by 2 ladies who were boarding the train, second attempt I WAS OUT!

In free air, there I was, victorious… I walked with pride, holding the head high… thanking the three lovely ladies!

Weekdays in Mumbai…

Auto rides in mornings

Staying in Malad, it takes 45-85 mins to reach ville parle (my office). These rides are awesome as it is so jam-packed and the speed is never more than 15 km/hr. So you get an hour to see the west Bombay daily.

People rushing to their offices, endless queues on bus stands, buses so overloaded that r so so apt for fevicol ads (I wonder why they take rajasthan when they can get a more natural view here :p) .

I get autos easily in the morning being a above 100 Rs savaari.

HSBC Office

Well well the office is cool.. so many eye-candies. I report usually at 9.30 when almost everybody is there already… I just have to report two people whom I m wrking with.. so no social chit chats there..

nevertheless coming back to office it’s the corporate office, huge building on western express highway… suave guys, charming ladies (just 4 information, I m straight o/w) .

The office culture here is much more open n blunt as compared to that of NCR, so quite amusing. But yes the feel of a corporate office, the pressure, the stress justifies it well. The normal working hours here are 9.30 – 20.30 .. I know.. quite a lot.. bt ppl survive here.

Achievements are celebrated here, birthdays obviously are celebrated here as elsewhere, and to tell u even Monsoons are celebrated here. As quoted by one of the colleagues.. ‘basically reasons doesn’t call 4 celebration here, celebrations calls for reasons..

Had 2 vadapavs on friday n a bhutta.. yummie is the word!

Bombay Diaries…!!

4/7/09

Finally arrived Mumbai yesterday at 10.50 pm.. ohhhhh god 5 hrs in 1.75 hrs flight.. uff… tired …, thank goodness Mr. Saani was there to receive…. We took a taxi to Malad.. the place was all running .. quite similar to Delhi.. It was raining.. which I hv realized by today is a bt obvious thing.. n the different thing is when it not rains!!    So cuming to raods and streets and buildings .. seemed quite similar to my dear delhi.. Mr saani ..it was so sweet of him to wait for me for 4 hrs in that cunning rain… well it was not rain actually.. it was ‘boonda baandi’  as we say in punjaabi , at Joe’s place, Sheenam was there.. she was waiting 4 me to dine.. so very sweet of her..  actually she herself is a very sweet and helping lady.. had dinner with her , then Wished Joe bday and slept

Today 4^th july was the most boring day in my life in atleast last year.. I was house arrest.. Both of Joe’s colleagues were resting… Obviously working ppl deserve that ..

n I did the following things from 0800-1800:

Phone Calls, Exploring ankur’s lappy, again phonecalls, watching matrix, again phonecalls n nore phonecalls L, well on one hand it seemed such a relaxing day.. bt then I was restless for I had come to Mumbai to rest????????

Bt in evenin, Adu came to my rescue, she came for nightstay… so I am now goin to chit chat with her,…. Tataazzzzzzzz

6/7/09

‘baju mein hai’, kidhar jaane ka hai’, ‘lene ka hai ke nahi’, ‘old dongri chalega’ …………… n so on n so forth

These words might appear friendly to some of u… they seemed amusing to me in last two days… n u know what today I asked one shopwaala.. ‘cyber café kidhar mein hai?’ .. I cudnt believe myself when I uttered those words for I m the person who never allows such grammarless use of Hindi… but this is the bhaasha of our dear Bombay.. well I wud not like to call it Mumbai for some reason..

The so called corporate hub.. true is it.. it never stops.. autos come n go, taxis come n go.. more people on roads than vehicles, it seems the entire bombay is going to the place u want to go.. endless bus lines , (still to experience the LOCAL!)

Cost of living is very high.. u’ll hv to earn 5 times more to get the same standard of living as in Delhi.. bt ppl I mus say here are bindaas, no formality.. truly professional, helpful (specially the autowaalas).. u wont get cheated if u r new to the place unless u r very dumb

First day at HSBC today.. nthng much to talk abt .. had lots of gyan… first by my mentor n then by a couple of manuals..bt best part is many eye candies to pass time.. how I wish there wud hv been just one more person with me , one friend of mine to enjoy the days here, nevertheless today was just the first day so lets hope for the best 

Mumbaiya dictionary

Baaju mein hai: It is atleast 100 meter away

Auto bill: Is always one Re less than the meter reading

From a beautiful heart……(thanku my frnd for such a lovely poem!)

………….

Thank you for being my friend

Thank you for holding out a helping hand.

Thank you for loving me for who i am

and i thank you for loving me as i am

Thank you for always being there for me

i can’t name one time you werent there when i was in need…

Thank you for bringing a smile upon my face everrrrrrryday!!!!

Thank you for caring when no one else did

Thank you for listening to what i had to say

you really didn’t have to but you did anyway.

I thank you today, tomorrow, and the next day

because your the only one who loved me in every single way

Friendship is a strange thing…

We find ourselves telling each other

The deepest details of our lives…

Things we don’t even share

With our families who raised us…

But what is a friend?

A confidant? A lover?

A shoulder to cry on?

An ear to listen? A heart to feel?…

A friend is all these things…and more.

No matter where we met & how we met,…

I call you friend.

A word so small…yet so large in feeling…

A word filled with emotion.

It is true……

Great things come in small packages.

Antakshri of the day!!!

Sonia:

Aaj main oopar aasmaan neeche , Aaj main aage zamaana hai peechhe

Aaj main oopar aasmaan neeche, Aaj main aage zamaana hai peechhe

Tell me o khuda, Ab main kya karoon

Chaloon seedhi ki ulti chaloon

Aaj main oopar aasmaan neeche , Aaj main aage zamaana hai peechhe

Advani:

Chan Se jo tute koi sapna, JAg suna suna lage (2)

Koi rahe na jab apna, JAg suna suna lage

Jag suna suna lage, Jag suna suna

Hai to yeh kyun hota hai, Jab yeh dil rota hai

Roye sisak sisak ki hawayein, Jag suna lage

Laalu:

gaddi jandi e chhalanga maardi,

mainu yaad aave congress yaar di!

gaddi jandi e chhalanga maardi,

mainu yaad aave congress yaar di!

Mayawati:

Dil ke armaan aansuon mein beh gaye

Dil ke armaan aansuon mein beh gaye -2

Hum wafa karke bhi tanha reh gaye

Dil ke armaan aansuon mein beh gaye

Congress:

Ye  Ek Colour Ke Tera Patte, Lekin Sab Mein Bas Ek King,

Ace Bhi Hum Hai, Base Bhi Hum Hai, Aur Jigar Mein Hain Daring

Hum, Hum Kare Dil Ki Jo Marzi, Karte Karte Bas Had Kar Di,

Dil Agar Sachcha Ho Rab Sab Karde Setting..

Singh Is King, Singh Is King, Singh Is King, Singh Is King, Singh Is King, Singh Is King

People leave, memories stay….

_

Gone though you have, I heard your voice today.

I tried to make out what the words might mean,

Like something seen half-clearly on a screen:

Each savoured reference, each laughing bark,

Sage comment, bad pun, indiscreet remark

_

Gone since you have, grief too in time will go,

Or share space with old joy; it must be so.

Live then in peace, but spare us some elation.

Separation cannot put down every conversation.

Over and out, as you once used to say?

Not on your life. You’re on this line to stay

Gone though you have, I heard your voice today.

I tried to make out what the words might mean,

Like something seen half-clearly on a screen:

Each savoured reference, each laughing bark,

Sage comment, bad pun, indiscreet remark

Gone since you have, grief too in time will go,

Or share space with old joy; it must be so.

Live then in peace, but spare us some elation.

Separation cannot put down every conversation.

Over and out, as you once used to say?

Not on your life. You’re on this line to stay

Thoughts at 3 AM: Do Matrimonial Sites really work?

…

IMT never sleeps. What’s the reason?  When somebody has to get up at 5.30 in the morning and she hasn’t slept till 3 in the morning, what’s the solution? Simple… keep herself engaged for next two hours and don’t sleep at all. Now what can we do in 2 hours:

Study: no never, Chatting: hmmmmm, Games: may be, Walk: nice idea

I’d like to share what we did on Sunday Night.

We searched the matrimonial sites – Bharat Matrimony, Shaadi.com, Punjabi Matrimony……

Quite amazing sites, one can see the profiles of any guy, pics, full profile, but if u r looking for a gal, hard luck guys, you’ll have to register on these sites!

Well we started looking for a suitable guy…somebody is too old, other is less qualified, than u fine one.. but he is settled abroad.. its so hard to find one suitable guy… Then finally I got one Mr. V**** M******* – cool, handsome, settled everything’s good.. started searching more about him.. He’s settled in Mumbai, VP Marketing ..wow.. but 30 yrs old.. 6 yrs elder..

“stop it Reena” comes an internal voice: Have I become so desperate .. Searching matrimonial sites,

I believe we all (singles) keep looking for someone to be a part of our lives at least once in a day and find options to fulfil it.

Also these sites are itself so funny and interesting.. One has to market oneself n that too in a limited space, “I am a decent and down to earth guy” , “I am an understanding guy and need the same kind of girl” n so on..

Most of the net savvy Singles today have either surfed these sites, look for in social networking sites (facebook, orkut etc) or regularly visit other such sites.

Inviting all others to give their view points on these sites since I find them
a) useless and waste of time if u need the result and only a medium to make money from users who end up registering for their premium services.

b) nice sites otherwise who are interested in marketing for viewing how people market themselves.

जीवन की आपाधापी में

Harivansh Rai Bachchan.

जीवन की आपाधापी में कब वक़्त मिला
कुछ देर कहीं पर बैठ कभी यह सोच सकूँ
जो किया, कहा, माना उसमें क्या बुरा भला।

जिस दिन मेरी चेतना जगी मैंने देखा
मैं खड़ा हुआ हूँ इस दुनिया के मेले में,
हर एक यहाँ पर एक भुलाने में भूला
हर एक लगा है अपनी अपनी दे-ले में
कुछ देर रहा हक्का-बक्का, भौचक्का-सा,
आ गया कहाँ, क्या करूँ यहाँ, जाऊँ किस जा?
फिर एक तरफ से आया ही तो धक्का-सा
मैंने भी बहना शुरू किया उस रेले में,
क्या बाहर की ठेला-पेली ही कुछ कम थी,
जो भीतर भी भावों का ऊहापोह मचा,
जो किया, उसी को करने की मजबूरी थी,
जो कहा, वही मन के अंदर से उबल चला,
जीवन की आपाधापी में कब वक़्त मिला
कुछ देर कहीं पर बैठ कभी यह सोच सकूँ
जो किया, कहा, माना उसमें क्या बुरा भला।

मेला जितना भड़कीला रंग-रंगीला था,
मानस के अन्दर उतनी ही कमज़ोरी थी,
जितना ज़्यादा संचित करने की ख़्वाहिश थी,
उतनी ही छोटी अपने कर की झोरी थी,
जितनी ही बिरमे रहने की थी अभिलाषा,
उतना ही रेले तेज ढकेले जाते थे,
क्रय-विक्रय तो ठण्ढे दिल से हो सकता है,
यह तो भागा-भागी की छीना-छोरी थी;
अब मुझसे पूछा जाता है क्या बतलाऊँ
क्या मान अकिंचन बिखराता पथ पर आया,
वह कौन रतन अनमोल मिला ऐसा मुझको,
जिस पर अपना मन प्राण निछावर कर आया,
यह थी तकदीरी बात मुझे गुण दोष न दो
जिसको समझा था सोना, वह मिट्टी निकली,
जिसको समझा था आँसू, वह मोती निकला।
जीवन की आपाधापी में कब वक़्त मिला
कुछ देर कहीं पर बैठ कभी यह सोच सकूँ
जो किया, कहा, माना उसमें क्या बुरा भला।

मैं कितना ही भूलूँ, भटकूँ या भरमाऊँ,
है एक कहीं मंज़िल जो मुझे बुलाती है,
कितने ही मेरे पाँव पड़े ऊँचे-नीचे,
प्रतिपल वह मेरे पास चली ही आती है,
मुझ पर विधि का आभार बहुत-सी बातों का।
पर मैं कृतज्ञ उसका इस पर सबसे ज़्यादा -
नभ ओले बरसाए, धरती शोले उगले,
अनवरत समय की चक्की चलती जाती है,
मैं जहाँ खड़ा था कल उस थल पर आज नहीं,
कल इसी जगह पर पाना मुझको मुश्किल है,
ले मापदंड जिसको परिवर्तित कर देतीं
केवल छूकर ही देश-काल की सीमाएँ
जग दे मुझपर फैसला उसे जैसा भाए
लेकिन मैं तो बेरोक सफ़र में जीवन के
इस एक और पहलू से होकर निकल चला।
जीवन की आपाधापी में कब वक़्त मिला
कुछ देर कहीं पर बैठ कभी यह सोच सकूँ
जो किया, कहा, माना उसमें क्या बुरा भला।